I am such a romantic.
And sometimes I don’t like it. Generally because of the life I have, the decisions I make… path I chose. I have to have a tough heart. I have to cover it with a thick armor, and protect it with spines, and apathy.
But beneath all the seemingly hard shell, is a soft, gooey, schmaltzy core… that is the inner me. The part that cushions all the pain, all the hurt, all the loneliness.
Okay, so I met a girl.
And I knew. Right on that first night that I saw her. That she is special. And I was right. She is even beyond that. She is smart, and beautiful, and carefree. She was extraordinary.
And I am not.
No, scratch that. I am extraordinary, too. But I am different. I am from a different realm. I am too dark, and shady. And I am worn, and tired, and bloody. And limping. And I have been to the edge, and I know that I will never go back to becoming shiny and new again. And she deserves shiny and new.
So, yeah. I know I am doing the right thing.
I know the world will not understand, but yeah, I exist. My realm exists. And maybe someday people will give a shit.
Or maybe not. I care less.
Thank you, words. I am okay now.
Need to fortify these walls.