CALM, WULF

I am such a romantic.

And sometimes I don’t like it. Generally because of the life I have, the decisions I make… path I chose. I have to have a tough heart. I have to cover it with a thick armor, and protect it with spines, and apathy.

But beneath all the seemingly hard shell, is a soft, gooey, schmaltzy core… that is the inner me. The part that cushions all the pain, all the hurt, all the loneliness.

abandoned_house

Okay, so I met a girl.

And I knew. Right on that first night that I saw her. That she is special. And I was right. She is even beyond that. She is smart, and beautiful, and carefree. She was extraordinary.

And I am not.

No, scratch that. I am extraordinary, too. But I am different. I am from a different realm. I am too dark, and shady. And I am worn, and tired, and bloody. And limping. And I have been to the edge, and I know that I will never go back to becoming shiny and new again. And she deserves shiny and new.

Not me.

So, yeah. I know I am doing the right thing.

I know the world will not understand, but yeah, I exist. My realm exists. And maybe someday people will give a shit.

Or maybe not. I care less.

—-

Thank you, words. I am okay now.

Need to fortify these walls.

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About lonewulf

I am a self-confessed 'jologs', a country boy who now works in the big city. I studied Applied Math, and am now completing Finance while working as a risk analyst. I feel extremely happy whenever I dance, draw/sketch, and write. I also like to read books, eat (not fruits, or vegetables), sleep, and travel. Update (12/2017) - I have already completed my Finance Masters in Diliman, plus Financial Engineering in Korea. I came back to Manila just last year from the Land of the Morning Calm, and is now currently working as a Risk Manager for a multinational financial institution. I am now updating this information box in the hopes that I will get my groove back into writing. I kinda missed it. And I actually have tons and tons of adventures that I have not logged in here. Hope to catch up to what's happening in my life. Here's to hoping for more adventures, and having enough time and energy to share all of them in this online realm. Cheers!

2 comments

  1. Hey! If u seriously met a girl..then don’t be scared…try to talk to jer

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