Life I realized is like a sinusoidal wave of good and bad times – and I imagine the next crest or trough to be larger than its predecessor.
Uhmm… What I mean with that is the amplitude of the waves are increasing over time. Do I make any more sense? Haha
Anyway, right now, at this very moment, I am in one of those ‘bad times’. And I’m not even sure if I am nearing the trough yet, God have mercy. I hate to admit this but the surmounting problems are already getting the better of me. They all are overwhelming that I just wanted to stop.
Stop moving. Stop making decisions. Stop fighting back.
I am not sure if I have written it here in this blog before but there are three situations I hated the most. First, is what I call a ‘dead-end’. Second is a ‘cliff’. And the last one is a ‘quicksand’. I hate it when I kept on running into dead-ends because sometimes encountering a cold solid wall wherever you turn simply sucks out all the hope in you. But with every dead-end you encounter you just need to turn around and find another way, because somewhere in that labyrinth sits the right turn.
The easiest of the three would have to be cliffs – you cannot move back but you needed to move forward to get away. The trick here is to muster all the ounce of confidence you have in your body and just JUMP. Take a leap of faith. I swear I have done this a lot of times in my life, just take that courageous leap and then deal with the fear of the unknown as I fall. So far, no jagged rocks at the bottom has killed me so I guess my method pretty much works.
The last type is what I consider the most dangerous. Quicksands! The more you move, or struggle, the MORE you sink. Lovely.
I am still baffled as to how to deal with life’s quicksands. But there’s one method I know that would always work. You need someone else out there to throw you a stick and pull you out of that hell-hole. This seemed easy but ladies and gentlemen, never forget how difficult it is to mutter the four-letter word H-E-L-P.
I am not sure if this predicament I am in now is a dead-end, a cliff, or a quicksand. But what I am entirely sure is that I badly need help. And I don’t know whether it’s pride or shame, but I am currently fighting this little devil so that I could finally shout the four-letter word. Wish me some luck here, dear reader.
And I also wish that I hit the trough soon. I want to curb myself back towards the next crest.
P.S. To my dearest crowd Xan, Tope, Ate Charm, AJ, Lucky, and most of all TJ… thank you for last night. I badly needed to momentarily take my mind off my sad sad predicament. You don’t know how much it means to me to be able to laugh that hard again.