Kimchilandia Chronicles – Chronological recounting of Lonewulf’s great Korean adventure


If you are under 18, or have a weak heart, please do not proceed on reading this entry.

I am actually warning you. See those cartoon characters they used on their entrance booth? Definitely not for kids.

HEY! Why are you still reading? Didn’t I tell you to leave this page?


There. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya

Okay, so you’re really curious huh? Come have this trip… at your own risk.


What a surprise! A huge stone penis welcomes you to the park. LOL. And I thought I understood Korean humor pretty well.

Shortstride’s bladders were about to burst as we entered, so to the loo she went first.

Check that handle! Haha
It’s a chair resembling an inverted half-of-a-woman
queer faucets
Our favorite “ate” in the whole park
Kidding aside, this piece is very artistic.
Kickin’ some balls!
Underwater “choink”
What are you exactly staring at, Shortstride?
Ready for some hot kangkangan
If I were you, I wouldn’t play with that fountain
See? It’s a giant penis.
Giant ‘bubelya’
Neither Arigato nor Shortstride dare accompany me in this shot. Haha
Eww! This is the filthiest.


it actually moves, if you press that white button
Gosh, I can’t believe I was harassed at the sight of these

Figurines! And now we are approaching my most embarrassing moment abroad. IN her comment in my previous post, Shortstride coerced me to not exclude this story in my Loveland post. Drrsscchh…

Okay, here we are.

The last two images are actually adjacent and it shows two rooms. One occupied by a couple doing the nasty-nasty, and the other one by boys who appear to be taking a break from playing cards and eavesdropping at the couple next door.

When I was in high school, we used to play with this deck of cards full of images of naked women. Someone sneaked it in our school dormitory (Yeah, our batch was one of the most notorious the school has ever had). So I was curious if the figurine boys were also playing the same kind of naughty cards. I tried to peek but couldn’t see it. So I tipped my head nearer for a better view. THUG!

My forehead bumped into the glass. Sheeesh… The gallery was really quiet so the sound I made surprised a huddle of ajummas few feet away from me. When they realized what happened, they bursted into giggles, pointing their hands at me, blabbering joyfully in Hanggul. That’s when Shortstride came back to check what the ruckus was about. And then she saw the forehead print I left on the glass and giggled too. When Arigato followed right behind her, she ushered him away instructing him to pretend they didn’t know me.

Jeeez! Very embarassing. 😦

To add insult to injury, we later had multiple other encounters with that crowd of ajummas in the park. And in all those encounters they blabbered and giggled and pointed at me. They even walked in on me having a picture with a naked sculpture, posing as if having sex with it. Argh! And right before we left, we saw them by the exit, sharing the story with their other companions, and they all laughed when they saw us hailing a cab.



Greek – Waagh! It’s a fawn
Japan – Shortstride liked this best, it’s passionate and it’s the least, how should I call it, lascivious?
miniature favorite “ate” in the entire park
turn the lever to be entertained
Woah! Acrobatic.

The different penis species

wooden and twin
penis and flower in one
the robot penis
the longest penis
Shortstride resting on an ongoing menage-a-trois

Definitely not for kids. But all in all, it was a one-of-a-kind experience. A definite must-visit in Jeju. That’s if you are not too uptight about the theme. 🙂


About lonewulf

I am a self-confessed 'jologs', a country boy who now works in the big city. I studied Applied Math, and am now completing Finance while working as a risk analyst. I feel extremely happy whenever I dance, draw/sketch, and write. I also like to read books, eat (not fruits, or vegetables), sleep, and travel. Update (12/2017) - I have already completed my Finance Masters in Diliman, plus Financial Engineering in Korea. I came back to Manila just last year from the Land of the Morning Calm, and is now currently working as a Risk Manager for a multinational financial institution. I am now updating this information box in the hopes that I will get my groove back into writing. I kinda missed it. And I actually have tons and tons of adventures that I have not logged in here. Hope to catch up to what's happening in my life. Here's to hoping for more adventures, and having enough time and energy to share all of them in this online realm. Cheers!

One comment

  1. Pingback: TO KIMCHILANDIA WE WENT | Lonewulf's Den

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